in cazul in care ti-ai propus sa schimbi personalitatea copilului sau sotului tau

Simt nevoia, din cand in cand, sa promovez o babuta cu o minte foarte sexy, anume Judith Rich Harris (75 de ani impliniti anul acesta, pe 10 februarie). A scris doua carti senzationale din care cei care citesc in stare de somn sau nu ii ajuta IQ-ul au inteles ca parintii nu conteaza (in procesul de dezvoltare a copiilor)

Fireste, atunci cand da interviuri este confruntata in mod fatal cu concluzia de mai sus (care nu-i apartine) Iata un raspuns frumos din The Spiked Review of Books:

Another misunderstanding occurred when the media compressed my message into three little words, ‘Parents Don’t Matter’. What I actually said was that parents have no long-term effects on their children’s personalities or on the way they behave when they’re outside the home. That doesn’t mean that parents don’t matter – they have other roles to play in their children’s lives. If I convinced you that you can’t modify your husband’s personality, would you conclude that Wives Don’t Matter?

Si inca unul, deoarece nu-mi pot controla impulsurile:

First of all, some people have the erroneous idea that my theory is based on my own personal experiences or motivations. The truth is that, while I was raising my own kids, my beliefs were entirely conventional. Like everyone else, I believed in the power of nurture. I didn’t realise that there was anything wrong with the traditional view of development until long after my kids had left the nest. What changed my mind was a long, hard look at the research evidence. I spent a year reading the research literature in a variety of fields, including anthropology, social psychology, evolutionary psychology, and behavioral genetics. The more I read, the more I noticed that there were things that didn’t fit into the traditional story. One day it all came together in my head.

PS Unii oameni nu reusesc sa faca diferenta intre personalitate si caracter. Ii asigur ca nu sunt deloc unul si acelasi lucru. Iar parintii conteaza, adesea chiar foarte mult, in formarea si dezvoltarea caracterului. Cum unii vor afla, daca sunt norocosi si prind locuri, la Mini Apps.

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